How To Avoid Raping Someone

In my previous post, I discussed sexual assault in our society. I gave the statistics, facts, and cold, hard truth about how often it happens and to how many people. In this post, I’m going to explain how you can avoid raping someone in different scenarios. Sexual assault in the public eye is more prevalent than it ever has been. Every day there’s a new headline about an actor or producer who performed an inappropriate act with a person in an inferior position. I’m here to help prevent anyone else from committing these same crimes. Follow my simple step-by-step instructions, and you’ll be well on your way to safe, consensual sex!

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Photo by Senior Airman Steele C. G . Britton via Air Force District of Washington.

Scenario 1

You’re at a bar, and you are really hitting it off with a girl. Drinks are flowing, you might even kiss a little. You want to take this girl home so badly. You bring her close and ask her if she’d like to spend the night with you. She politely declines, but gives you her phone number for another time. WHAT! You just bought this girl two drinks! You remember that you have a roofie in your pocket, and contemplate putting it in her next drink.

Here’s how you avoid raping her.

Step 1. Do NOT put the roofie in her drink because that would be illegal.

Step 2. Take that roofie and flush it down the toilet because that too is illegal.

Step 3. Respect her wishes to not come home with you.

Step 4. Call her the next day and ask her on a proper date if you are interested.

Step 5. Do not rape her on said date.

Scenario 2

You see a woman dressed in revealing clothing walking to her car at night alone. She is super hot, and you would love to get her in bed. No one else is around but you two. She notices you staring at her. You have the urge to have sex with her right now.

Here’s how you avoid raping her.

Step 1. Stop staring at her because it makes her feel uncomfortable. You should not make people feel that way.

Step 2. Do not walk over to her. It is nighttime, and she already feels threatened by you because of your staring.

Step 3. If you are feeling chivalrous, you can ensure that she gets to her car safely from wherever you are standing. Remember Step 1, though, and do not stare.

Step 4. Do not rape her.

Scenario 3 

You’re in bed with a woman, and things are getting hot and heavy. You’ve had a couple of drinks. She suddenly passes out from the alcohol. She doesn’t wake up to your nudging and poking. How could she do this to you? What a tease, right? Wrong!

Here’s how you avoid raping her.

Step 1. Stop whatever you are doing and ensure that she is okay.

Step 2. Put your clothes back on.

Step 3. Do not lay a hand on her.

Step 4. Cover her with a blanket, and tuck her nicely into bed.

Step 5. (Optional) Sleep on the couch.

Step 6. Do not rape her.

And there you have it! Easy steps on how to avoid raping someone with different scenarios included. I hope this was informative. Remember, DON’T RAPE PEOPLE.

Sexual Assault In Our Society

According to RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) every 98 seconds, an American is sexually assaulted. On average, there are 321,500 victims of rape and sexual assault each year in the United States. One out of every six American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime. 21% of TGQN (transgender, genderqueer, nonconforming) college students have been sexually assaulted.

Not only do people have to suffer in the moment of being sexually assaulted, but they can also have long-term effects. The likelihood that a person suffers suicidal or depressive thoughts increases after sexual violence. People who have been sexually assaulted are more likely to use drugs than the general public.

These statistics alone prove that sexual assault happens too often and to too many innocent people. These numbers aren’t even completely factual, however. A 2000 study from the Bureau of Justice Statistics found that only 28% of victims report their sexual assault to the police. That means 72% of victims don’t report their assault to law enforcement officials. These numbers would be higher if every single person who was ever sexually assaulted reported it. I’m scared to think of how high these numbers would jump.

Why does this continue to happen? What makes people believe they have the right to disregard someone’s consent for their own sexual desire? I think Rape Culture has a lot to do with this issue. Rape Culture is an environment in which sexual violence against women is normalized and/or excused in our society and media.

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Image by Senior Airman Clayton Lenhardt via U.S. Air Force.

Women and girls most often have to fear sexual assault while men often do not. According to One In Four,  for female rape survivors, 98.1% of the time a man was the perpetrator. For male rape survivors, 93% of the time, a man was the perpetrator. The common factor here is that men rape much more often than women rape.

Does this happen because of the way boys are raised? Is pop culture to blame? Where along the way did someone tell boys it was okay to do whatever they wanted? Now I want to know what you guys think. Why does rape happen? Who, or what, is to blame? Post your answers in the comments.

Thanks for reading! I can’t wait to see what you guys think.